"Your body speaks up for you when you do not speak up for yourself."


Although freedom of speech is a first amendment right, at what point does my right to speak judgmentally about your body infringe on your freedom to pursue happiness in your own way?

A fundamental truth behind every remark anyone makes, is their reason for making it. If it’s negative in any way, it tells us more about the person making the remark than the truth of the statement. In this era of “fake news”, sloppy speech comes easy as there are apparently no damaging consequences to the speaker.

The blowback from recent fat shaming is the challenge of body acceptance vs personal health. The truth is “real women have curves” along with a heartbeat, legs, arms, and a digestive system. How those physical elements present themselves depends on genetics, education, and cultural value systems.

As Ashley Graham acknowledged in her newest book, “A New Model”, she owes a lot of her success to the women of color who have been valued in their cultures around the world since the beginning of time. Even though our culture pressures all women to resemble the impossible Barbie image, how we differ from that impossible to achieve icon does not detract from our feminity. puts it this way “We have a personal responsibility to ourselves to be happy. We have a responsibility to play the hand we’re dealt, challenge ourselves to be better and take action on improving our lives. Nowhere is there a place for insulting others.”


You are not alone

After decades of experience as a dancer/choreographer, then personal trainer, healthy life style coach, I realized my clients came to me with their minds resenting what they perceived as their bodies letting them down.

It didn’t take long for me to realize they had their facts reversed.

It wasn’t their bodies letting them down, it was their minds ignoring their bodies.

My education and experience realized there was a disconnect between their desired outcome from our work together, and what I knew was the only approach that produces real, sustainable results.

The Body Knowledge System® is the result and it begins with the body, and re-establishing the individual’s awareness of their  body.

fear of shopping

Get over your body anxiety.  Discover your body confidence.

Take Action

To deal with the anxiety you feel about your body, you spend some time with her.

1) Find a Mirror

Look at yourself. Think of your body as a friend, and not an enemy.

Then SMILE at Your Body, because she’s smiling at YOU!

2) Talk with your Body

Be honest about your worries and concerns with her.

Maybe you feel, “Yuck, my baby weight is still there…”

Maybe you’ll start picking on her, “Thighs, elephant knees, where did my lap go?”

Maybe you see a few things you like. “Well, I still have my waist…”

Be honest about these words and emotions.

3) Learn to Listen to your Body

What does your body need from you?

“Next time, take the stairs.”

“I could use more water…”

Remember NO BODY is perfect!



As we discussed on Tuesday, understanding some of the hormones that aid or detract from our weight regulation efforts is part of our overall Body Knowledge. Understanding the roles of each hormone is already present in our body, but as her BFF we owe her awareness of the actions of those hormones. Too much of one, too little of the other will alter your metabolism in unfavorable ways.

If your objective is to lose weight, help your body along by feeling full after a satisfactory input of food. In other words, enhance the release Leptin not only by how much you choose to eat, but also what you choose.

There is an ironic twist to the balance between these two hormones: you have an ideal appestat set point, when you have exceeded it (ignoring your body’s signals to stop eating NOW!, or making consistently bad food choices, or comfort binging rather than responding to hunger signals) with a weight gain. Your appestat will re-set to accommodate the excess weight.


In this case: more is less.

The more weight you gain, the less leptin will be released to tell your body to STOP eating!

Find out more than you want to know at the website listed above. And how the Body Knowledge System® is the simple solution to restoring the balance between Ghrelin and Leptor.


Yes! The circumstances around the levels of your appetite are less important than the effect your environment on your hormones. Another fun segment on GMA last week about natural metabolism regulators available to all of us when we pay attention to our bodies.

According to Dr. Jen Ashton, MD there are hormones that control your feelings of hunger or fullness. Your body sends signals to your mind about your need to eat, and then when to stop eating. They are known as the “hunger hormones.”

1.  The hormone Ghrelin increases appetite and therefore plays a role in body weight.

2.  Leptin is a hormone produced by fat cells and decreases your appetite giving you that “full” feeling.

So how do you reduce Ghrelin levels to lose weight?

1.  Get at least 7 hours of sleep every night.

2.  Eat animal protein at every meal

3.  Increase Omega-3

4.  Reduce stress. …

5.  Eat High Fiber Foods to fill up your stomach …

Check in on Thursday for the other half of the hunger hormone equation!  Oh, and don’t forget, the Body Knowledge System® brings the balance back!

white and gray  minimal living room

If you haven’t read Tuesday’s words of wisdom, click here then come right back for the rest of the info.

There are several resources to get your genetic eating plan that provides body confidence for what’s best for you to fuel your body efficiently, effectively, and healthily. As reviewed by Dr. Jen Ashton, there has not been enough data to determine the outcomes, but the placebo effect works 3o % of the time.

The most expensive at $309 examines your DNA, metabolism and blood work from an at-home test to determine which one of 7 categories fit you. In addition, they supply some coaching, online App, and follow up recommendations.

The Orig3n service at $149 looks at your DNA from the saliva sample you mail in from home. Those results will provide dietary suggestions to achieve your goals.

There are others popping up online if you Google them, however the Body Knowledge System® can supply all the information required for a successful eating program to achieve body confidence.

Take the short cut to body confidence, contact Coach Stephanie to learn how to talk to your body and stop your war with food!

stop dieting

Ok, first let me assure you we at Body Confidence know that the word “die” introduces the word “diet”, and therefore we don’t believe in deprivation to solve any body issues. Rather the essence of Body Confidence is listening to your body’s recommendations about what belongs in her and what doesn’t to promote wellbeing for both of you.

Of course, we can train you to open those channels of communication to listen to her suggestions, or you can spend some money, take a simple swab test and ship it off to one of the laboratories specializing in your metabolism requirements.

The jury is still out, but the responses of those who have tried to follow the recommendations suggested by the technicians who have analyzed their genes are optimistic.

As reported on GMA last week, one happy responder says,

“Don’t know about any weight loss yet, but I’ve lost inches where I wanted to lose them.”  The DNA experts pointed out that any weight loss needs to be slow and steady to be effective long term.

Check back Thursday, for specifics from Coach Stephanie.



The term “plus” when applied to clothing sizes is a pejorative. I love that word, pejorative, because it sounds exactly what it means: defamatory, discriminatory, judgmental and altogether nasty-negative!

When manufacturers determine their product sizes, there is no standard measurement. (Please see articles on the origins of sizes in women’s clothing on this website.)

As of today, some designers consider women sizes 12 and above as “plus” sizes, others assign “plus” to above 16. Today the average size sold to American women is a 16; and it hardly qualifies those women as outside the norm, as they are the norm!

Aside from celebrated individuals, (Ashley Graham, Melissa McCartney, Amy Schumer, among others) who have confidently pushed for body acceptance, the media is getting on board by acknowledging “one size fails to fit all!” Project Runway became inclusive this season with the inclusion of larger models and designers to clothe them.

Last week, KMART announced the re-naming of plus to fabulously sized clothing, and eliminating the separation (some would say isolation) of that category from the rest of the department.

Along with Lane Bryant’s new branding celebrating “curvy” for their clothing lines, it looks like we are WINNING! Finally, through individual efforts at acceptance of the current reality of women’s healthy bodies, the social institutions have received the message and are joining the rest of us in respecting our individuality.

Advertising, social media, and commercial markets are broadening their message to accept all of us as equals.

Keep this positive momentum going: Join the Body Confidence Movement!

Call Coach Stephanie to find out how!


Although she lost her lawsuit against a Silicon Valley venture capital firm in 2015, Ellen K. Pao came back strong to rid all workplaces of discrimination and sexual harassment. Hailed by Time Magazine as the “Face of Change” her message overcame negative assaults and retaliation for her courage and confidence in challenging the status quo in Silicon Valley and beyond.

As CEO of Reddit, Ms. Pao took on the negative trolling present in Social Media. Her company is on alert for personal attacks on individuals based on gender, sexual orientation, religion, or body image. The result of all of her activism is the recent publication of her personal and professional story, “Reset” My Fight for Inclusion and Lasting Change.”

What does that mean for the rest of us?

Most of us lack her education, expertise, and yes, intelligence to create her accomplishments, but ALL of us have her capacity for courage and the confidence it takes to express it personally and professionally.

All it takes is one of us to inspire all of us!

Thank you, Ellen K Pao!

Now it’s our turn.

What can you do to take your first step to Body Confidence today?

Call Coach Stephanie.


Experts agree that confidence is the key to success. If you believe you can, you can. And the reverse is also true! So, the first step to getting what you want is believing you can have it.

I can already hear your comment, “Yes, but…”

The “but” is the barrier.

The phrase following the “but” is your indication of what prevents you from getting what you want. What are your words following the “but”?

For every word you utter denying you your dreams, your body has a creative answer allowing you to achieve your dreams.

If you think that your creativity resides only in your brain, you are limiting your possibilities….
Your body has wisdom she wants you to explore.

Call Coach Stephanie

Now Available

NEW eBooks

Stay Informed

Sign up to get body tips, event announcements and other news.

We respect your email privacy

    No events to show

Wellness Assessment

The Body Awareness Assessment© is your starting point to a system that will help you feel fabulous and inspire you to make a life-long commitment to maintaining that feeling.

Take The Free Assessment